Adios, Adrian. Don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

On second thought, yeah, let it hit you. Hard.

Based on comments Minnesota Vikings running back Adrian Peterson made to ESPN.com last week, it’s time for the organization to stop the United We Stand front it’s been putting up and facilitate Peterson’s exit from Minnesota.

The Vikings should work a deal, which will never be as good as they want, and end this mess.

In an interview with ESPN’s Ben Goessling, Peterson said he was “uneasy” about returning to the Vikings in 2015, a season during which he would be paid $12.75 million by the franchise that’s paid him in excess of $30 million in his career. Part of Peterson’s unease with returning to Minnesota is he doesn’t like the way he was treated by the media and some in the organization in the aftermath of child abuse charges against him.

In other words, Peterson is painting himself as a victim.

Pathetic.

“I know there are a lot of people in the organization who want me back,” Peterson told Goessling. “But then again, I know the ones who don’t. It’s a difficult transition, and it’s not just about me. I have a wife who was able to sit back and see how people in Minnesota said this and said that, how media in Minnesota took the head of the situation with my child, and were digging into things that weren’t even relevant. That wasn’t people in Texas — it was people in Minnesota that dug in and brought things out. That impacted me, but most importantly, it impacted the people around me — my family, my kids.

“This came from the state I love so much, that I wish to bring a championship to? This is how they treat me when I’m down and out? You kick me? My wife (and I), we’ve had several conversations about me returning to Minnesota, what the best options are. If I left it up to her, I’d be somewhere else today, and that’s with her weighing everything. It’s a lot for me to weigh; she understands that. But there are some things that I’m still uneasy about.”

This sentence, in particular, is telling: “This came from the state I love so much, that I wish to bring a championship to? This is how they treat me when I’m down and out? You kick me?”

Poor, poor Adrian. All he wants to do is win a Super Bowl for Minnesota. It’s his top priority in life aside, perhaps, from avoiding birth control at all costs. Yet when photographic evidence is presented that he whipped his defenseless 9-year-old son with a switch on the buttocks, testicles and legs, the media jackals in Minnesota don’t have the good sense to look the other way and continue to be his No. 1 cheerleader like those good ol’ boys down in Texas.

It must be tough getting out of bed every day when so much of the world is against you.

What this tells me is Adrian Peterson didn’t learn much of anything from this fiasco, that all of the alleged contrition and lesson-learning was only so much malarkey. Adrian’s lawyers told him the public wanted to see some contrition, so Adrian told everybody how sorry he was. It seems now the tone-deafness Peterson exhibited early in this controversy – never quite understanding why whipping his kid was a big deal – hasn’t completely worn off.

Noticeably absent from the grievance list is the sponsors who dumped the Vikings and/or Peterson once it became obvious they weren’t going to “get it right.” It was the organization who originally stood behind Peterson, even in the face of public outcry, and didn’t change its stance until major sponsors like Radisson separated itself from the team and other, even-bigger sponsors like Budweiser hinted it might pull its dollars from the NFL. Nike, too, suspended its support of Peterson.

If Peterson truly felt aggrieved at those who abandoned him, he should have told Goessling: “My wife isn’t sure she wants me to accept money from Nike if they want me to endorse their products once I return to the league. They kicked me when I was down. I will be uneasy cashing Nike’s checks.”

There is the chance, of course, that Peterson’s words to Goessling were calculated to grease his exit from Minnesota, the same it’s possible all the love-words from the Vikings’ front office were meant to increase his trade value. Adrian would more than likely love to play for Jerry Jones and the Cowboys the remainder of his career, comfortable in his beloved Texas performing before fans who’ll support him unconditionally. So be it. The Vikings should expedite his migration to Dallas.

Adrian Peterson is a victim of nothing, except his own cluelessness and big mouth. Go away.

(Mike McFeely is a talk-show host on 790 KFGO in Fargo-Moorhead. He can be heard weekdays 2-5 p.m. Follow him on Twitter @MikeMcFeelyKFGO.)