veteran’s corner

Tom Krabbenhoft

Away from home for the holidays – it is something every veteran has been faced with. I brought in my two cousins, both career military, for their takes on being away from home at this special time of year. They are Wayne Oien of Fargo, and Paul Ziegler, who was raised in Georgetown, the son of long-time Extra contributor Marlis Ziegler. This is the first time in my recollection since we were all kids that they both will be home over Thanksgiving:

As a 28-year career GI, I spent many holidays away from home and missed many events. I was married with kids during the last of those 13 years. While I was gone, my wife mailed me pictures, drawings, stories, and homework to keep me current.

We had a deal with my deployments: All the “goodbyes” and “welcome homes” would take place AT home. Except that once ….

The summer of ’05 was my last deployment, a double-header with nine months in Afghanistan followed by three months in Africa. As my team and I loitered at the tarmac for hours before boarding the plane, the wives and kids were invited to watch.

It was the first time our kids had been in a strange area like this, knowing that they would have to leave me. Between that, the heat and a little bit of hunger, our youngest succumbed and began crying inconsolably. Then her sister also got weepy. It was a tough place to be, consoling my kids with all my subordinates watching, while struggling to manage my own myriad of emotions and supervising everyone and everything else around me. The kids eventually calmed down; we took a picture and parted ways.

The Christmas box I got that Thanksgiving of ‘05 included drawings by both girls depicting that departure day, each showing themselves crying. As I recently opened that same decorated box for the first time in 14 years and saw those drawings again, it was just as visceral to my post-service self as It had been long ago. – Wayne Oien

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I left the only home I knew in October 1988. I had joined the Army and was on my way to my first duty station in Seoul, South Korea. That year was the first of many holidays I missed with my family. I never gave it much thought at the time because in the Army, you develop a new family, so I was never alone for the holidays and always had a place to go.

The only thing missing was my family in Minnesota and North Dakota and the post-Thanksgiving Trivial Pursuit competitions. I recall that one year my cousin Tom and I won. It was an epic win!

Missing holidays never really became a big reality for me until I was married and had my own family. I was very fortunate to only miss a couple of holidays with my wife Raeleen and our kids. When I was with my family, Raeleen always went the extra mile to cook for all the single soldiers that were not able to be in their own homes. We made lifelong friends from those family holidays.

Nowadays, I long for the camaraderie and fellowship among fellow veterans. Those holidays were the best and will forever be stamped in my mind as we gathered as warriors, friends and family and enjoyed being Americans. – Paul Ziegler 

Tom Krabbenhoft belongs to many veterans and service organizations; he is currently a Realtor referral agent with Coldwell Banker Element Realty. Please share your story ideas or comments with him at 11btwk@gmail.com